Laughter is the best medicine⊠unless youâve had a dodgy burritoâthen you might need something stronger. đ But letâs be honest: shit jokes never get old. Theyâre cheeky, punny, and just the right amount of gross to make everyone chuckle.
Whether youâre here for some quick potty humor, witty puns, or laugh-out-loud one-liners, this post is your ultimate bathroom reading material.
So, sit tight (on the throne if you prefer) and letâs dive into the funniest shit jokes on the internet!
Classic Shit Jokes That Always Get a Laugh
- Iâm reading a book on toilets⊠itâs a real page-turner.
- Why did the poop cross the road? To get to the toilet paper.
- My bathroom humor is solid⊠sometimes runny.
- Donât trust farts after taco night.
- Life is full of crapâflush and move on.
- I stepped in dog poop today⊠it was a sole-crushing experience.
- Iâm a big fan of toilet humorâitâs number one and number two!
- Poop jokes arenât my favorite, but theyâre a solid number two.
- Why was the toilet paper rolling down the hill? To get to the bottom.
- A poop walks into a bar⊠bartender says, âGet out, youâre full of crap.â
- I had a joke about constipation, but Iâm stuck.
- Always trust the smellâit never lies.
- My poop jokes stink, but theyâre still funny.
- Crap happens, laugh about it.
- This humor might be crappy, but itâs pure gold.
Funny Bathroom Humor for Adults
- The restroom is the only place where multitasking is mandatory.
- I hate it when you sit down and the seat is warm⊠means someone else just dropped their kids off.
- Bathroom selfies: proving you look best when nobodyâs watching.
- I had a long meeting todayâmostly with the toilet.
- Toilet humor is childish⊠but Iâm laughing anyway.
- Sitting on the toilet is like meditation, only louder.
- Sometimes my Wi-Fi is strongest in the bathroomâitâs destiny.
- Why do toilets make great friends? They always listen.
- Nothing bonds people like saying, âDonât go in there for 10 minutes.â
- Restroom stalls: the original phone booths.
- Privacy is overrated until you need to poop.
- Why donât secrets stay secret in bathrooms? Too many leaks.
- Toilets: where all great ideas are born.
- My toilet and I⊠a love-hate relationship.
- If bathrooms could talk, theyâd scream.
Toilet Paper Jokes That Roll You Over
- Toilet paper is the most underrated superhero.
- Why is TP so clingy? It always sticks around.
- Shortage of toilet paper? Thatâs the real endgame.
- TP never complains, just rolls with it.
- Toilet paper is like family: sometimes rough, sometimes smooth.
- The last square of TP is more valuable than gold.
- Why did the TP fail school? It couldnât keep it together.
- Double-ply = luxury living.
- Toilet paper hoarding: the sport of 2020.
- I once dated toilet paperâit was too clingy.
- Why did the TP break up with the toilet? Too much crap.
- Nothing beats the comfort of a fresh roll.
- TP jokes always come full circle.
- I prefer my humor like my TP: on a roll.
- A bathroom without TP? Thatâs a wipeout.
Poop Puns That Stink (in a Good Way)
- Youâre the shitâliterally.
- Poop jokes are stinkinâ hilarious.
- Thatâs a load of crap.
- Keep calm and poop on.
- Donât talk trash, talk crap.
- This party is poop-tacular.
- Poop happens, flush it away.
- That joke was solid gold⊠like corn.
- Crappy day? Make it funny.
- Youâre full of poop and giggles.
- A dump a day keeps the stress away.
- Feces the day!
- Holy crap, thatâs funny.
- Poop-tastic vibes only.
- Iâve got a gut feeling⊠and itâs crap.
Dirty Jokes That Keep It Light
- I tried to clean my humor, but itâs still dirty.
- Soap and poop: best enemies.
- Bathroom cleaning day = regret day.
- Messy jokes, clean laughs.
- You canât polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter.
- I scrubbed the toiletânow Iâm emotionally drained.
- Showers wash dirt, not memories.
- Cleaning bathrooms: the true test of love.
- Dirty jokes are like soapâthey slip out easily.
- Bathrooms are proof humans are messy.
- Poop stains fade, but jokes last forever.
- Clean humor? Nah, I prefer it dirty.
- Every bathroom has a horror story.
- You canât hide dirtâit smells.
- Cleaning up after others? Thatâs real crap.
Silly Fart and Poop Jokes
- Silent but deadly: the deadliest weapon.
- Farts are just poopâs little brother.
- A fart is just a cry for freedom.
- Passing gas is the worldâs oldest language.
- Never trust a fartâitâs sneaky.
- A fart is like Wi-Fiâyou donât see it, but you know itâs there.
- Farts bring people closerâsometimes unwillingly.
- If laughter is contagious, farts are worse.
- The smell of betrayal: a fart in an elevator.
- Farts: the soundtrack of digestion.
- Donât hold it inâitâll backfire.
- Farting is just the bodyâs way of applauding the meal.
- A fart a day keeps relationships away.
- Farts: comedyâs natural sound effect.
- The fart never lies.
Food and Poop Jokes
- Taco Tuesday = Toilet Wednesday.
- Beans: natureâs comedy show.
- Pizza today, problem tomorrow.
- Curryâdelicious regret.
- Ice cream runs⊠literally.
- Fast food = faster bathroom trips.
- Salad keeps it green, in every way.
- Too much cheese = constipation nation.
- Coffee: the morning laxative.
- Burritos are bombs waiting to drop.
- Spicy food? Say goodbye to comfort.
- Junk food leads to funky poop.
- Burgers in, problems out.
- Sugar rush = bathroom flush.
- Eat clean, poop proud.
Relatable Shit Jokes for Everyday Life
- Running late? Bathroom says no.
- Public toilets: the ultimate gamble.
- Nothing worse than no toilet paper in sight.
- When you need to go, the line is always long.
- âOccupiedâ = heartbreak.
- Ever sneeze while pooping? Multitasking.
- The relief of finding a clean stall: priceless.
- Loud poop in public = silent shame.
- Walking funny after spicy food is relatable AF.
- Nothing bonds people like toilet humor.
- Worst nightmare: knocking with no answer.
- Sitting down and realizingâwrong bathroom.
- That awkward eye contact through the stall crack.
- When you clog the toiletâpure panic.
- Everyone poops, but no one admits it.
đ Conclusion
And there you have itâshit jokes that are guaranteed to make you laugh, groan, and maybe even share with your friends (but probably not at the dinner table). đ Humor doesnât always have to be clean to be funnyâsometimes, the best laughs come from the messiest places.
So the next time someone says your jokes are crappy, take it as a c. After all, crap happensâbut laughter makes it better! đ©